The Best Operator Call Ever

Me: Iowa State Operator.
Lady: Hi, what does VEISHEA stand for?
Me: *looks it up with a simple Google search* ... It's an acronym for the colleges that were a part of Iowa State University at the time the celebration was first created. *I list the colleges...*
Lady: Okay, thanks, hey y'all know it's going to be 45 degrees out on Saturday, right?
Me: That's...awful...?
Lady: Naw, actually, I think it's pretty good, because we're bringing our dog. He's a Mahlemuit, and he has a double coat. They're just one step away from wolves. They're the dogs used in the Iditarod, if you know what that is...

[2 minutes telling me about Mahlemuits, with me desperately looking for an opportunity to hang up, or really any way to get a word in edgewise without offending this person, who possibly intends to spend money at VEISHEA]

Me: Well, thanks for that information. Is there anything else I can help you with? (Yes, I realize this was a huge mistake. I actually physically cringed as I finished the sentence.)
Lady: Do you know what time the parade is?
Me: *more googling*...10:30AM.

[1 minute talking about last year's parade.]

Lady: And what time do the booths open? They have some great freebies at some of them if you get there early.
Me: *guessing, because I have already spent far too long on this call* 9:00 AM?
Lady: Perfect, that's when we were gonna get there.

[coworkers are looking at me now from the support area, and laughing]

Lady: You know, last year there was a girl standing around the planned parenthood booth with a shirt that said "Abortion is the equivalent of capital punishment", and she had a sign that said "baby killers" on it.
Me: Uh, wow. Well, people have diverse opinions, and it's definitely well within her rights to protest.
Lady: I told her good job. It is murder.
Me: [getting extremely uncomfortable] And you're certainly entitled to your opinion on that matter.
Lady: What's your view on it?
Me: I can't... uh... I'm not allowed to give my opinion on this line.

[She says one or two more things about abortion and how wrong it is, and I tell her that I have to help someone else now..which is true, a guy has just walked into the Solution Center.]

Lady: Okay, before you go, [NOOOOOOOO] are you playing Tangled for the outdoor movie on Friday night?
What I wish I had said: I'm sorry, you used all the time I would have normally spent answering that question going off on random tangents.
What I was obligated by policy to say: There's an outdoor movie on Thursday night, and it's The Green Hornet.
Lady: What's that about?
What I should have said: Do you OWN a computer?! Have access to one, even?
What I did say: It's kind of a superhero movie.
Lady: Do you know if that's appropriate for children?
What I might have said if I didn't care about the university's reputation: Nope. There's boobs, blood and guts everywhere. And gratuitous amounts of drug use. And every other word is an F-bomb.
What I did say: I'm afraid I don't know.
Lady: Alright then... thanks.
Me: Have a nice night! *click*

:|




Also...

For anyone who is curious after reading this, I am tentatively pro-choice, although I think that adoption is almost always a better option. I would never agree to the abortion of a child I helped conceive, but I don't think it's within my rights to "save people from themselves" by preventing anyone else from getting one. In other words, I think they are to be avoided, but not banned completely.

There is no title I like enough to commit to.

Just a few idle words;
nothing complex,
nothing meaningful.

They're enough to affirm
my existence in your eyes;
they're beautiful.

Here it goes again,
I feel I'm falling away
from blue skies, cold for a spring day.

But there's nothing I can do,
nothing more to say;
I have nothing left for you.

We were both meant to walk away.

I can't help but wish
I'd looked in the right place,
if only for a glimpse of your face.

But sadly, I just passed you by
with music in my ears,
and my thoughts trapped in the sky.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Today's poem is brought to you by boredom at work, the letter "E" and the number −1.602×10^(−19). Today's closing thought is brought to you by Sesame Street.

Edit: The back story to this is fairly simple, so I may as well post it. I passed someone I like a lot while running the other day, she texted me later saying she had seen me, and part of me wished I'd seen her so I could stop to talk. There's kind of a constant war going on in my head these days, between my desire to build connections and my instinct telling me to keep my distance since I'm leaving soon.

The Dillinger Escape Plan...

...are my heroes. That band is as amazing live as they are in their albums. Their musical ability is second to none that I've seen, and I've seen some pretty ridiculously talented bands.

My favorite band member is Greg Puciato, their lead singer. He really knows how to put on a high-energy, intense, and yet very warm and friendly show. He gets the crowd involved a lot. He's always right at the front of the stage, clasping hands, giving mic taps, interacting in any way he can. He doesn't so much sing TO his audience; he sings WITH them. At one point, he even jumped off the stage into the pit and gave everyone an opportunity to sing along. He basically became part of the pit for a while. It was really awesome.

Their instrumental parts are insanely complex, and generally seem impossible to play even in ideal conditions, but they manage to pull it off while flipping their guitars around, running all over the stage, jumping around, screaming the lyrics along with Greg... It's truly a sight to behold.

I managed to get a few pictures around the start of their set. I didn't get any really good ones, because I was right by the stage and the pit for most of the show, so I didn't want to take my phone out for fear it'd get knocked out of my hands. Anyway, I'll be able to remember that show without too many pictures I think.

Random things..

Senior Design is becoming a huge bitch. There's nothing more annoying than being told to write code, but not being given a specific requirement for what it should do. I did my best, and the people who I was writing it for said it's not what they expected. I can't even express how annoying that is.

This weekend I'm going to Des Moines to see The Dillinger Escape Plan live, and I am SUPER JACKED about it. My friend Brendan and I (and probably some other people) are going to hit the bars on Court Ave. before the show, too. I'm especially looking forward to the German bierhaus they've got down there. We're also going to hit up Guitar Center so that Brendan can look at new cymbals, and I can drool over guitars that I can't afford. Basically, it's going to be fun.

It's nice out, but I'm trapped at work... again. When I get out of here, I am going to go outside and run until my legs won't move anymore! Can't wait.



And, let's not forget...

Yet another monday morning...

Everything has a beginning and an end. We can't be afraid to start something just because it will eventually end, or nobody would ever get anywhere in life. Sometimes you end up in a familiar place after taking a chance, and sometimes that's not the most pleasant place to be. Last night I ended up somewhere that I've been several times over the past year: sitting in my room a little drunk, staring at the floor, and wondering if the good which came from my choices outweighed the pain they brought. It can be a really difficult question to answer, but the answer is "yes" this time. Fortunately, almost every time I've had to ask myself that question, I was able to answer similarly. Whenever I find that isn't true, I know that I'm not living the way I should.

I was dating someone for a while recently, someone who I ended up getting closer to than I originally intended. I told myself that we could just go out, have fun, and not really form an attachment since I'm leaving soon. I can't really control affection very well, though; it's one of my greatest flaws. Sarina was stronger than I was in this instance; despite feeling the same about me as I did about her, she was able to make a rational decision not to keep seeing me. She decided that it wasn't worth it to her to build our connection any further knowing that it was just going to be severed when I left. I know that it was the right choice for her, and I'm glad she made it. Maybe it was the right outcome for both of us, but I don't think I would have chosen to stop hanging out with her until I had to.

I feel like I'm in limbo right now. I can't forge more new connections with people here, because I'll be gone before they ever develop into anything meaningful. I can't go back to Omaha yet, and even if I could, I wouldn't want to; I want to spend as much time with my friends here as possible. When I get there, though, I wonder if this feeling of being between phases of my life will change. I have to assume it will, but I wish there was some guarantee.

Despite the "voice" I'm using in this post, I'm really not too down. On the contrary, I am still pretty content with life. I really need to stop staying up so late on Sunday nights, though. Last night I went to Welch Ave. Station with Mike, Kelly and Bauer... Seemed like a great idea at the time, but I am even more tired than usual this morning. Not only did I stay out until 2:30AM, but I drank as well. Still made it to work by 7:05, though! I think I deserve a medal or something. The "Award for Overcoming One's Own Stupidity" seems like an appropriate name for such a prize. I can't wait to go home and sleep. Normally that's impossible for me during the day, but I have a feeling I might just pull it off this time!

This just in...

The new BTBAM and Periphery EPs are SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII...

[insert a lot more "I"s here]

...IIIIIICK.

That's all I have to say at the moment.

holy shit

Im relly drunk. Yes, at 10AM. No i dont want to talk about it.

Hey internet, you ever thought that you believed in osmething and later realized it is just a bunch of bullshit? Tahts basically what happened to me last night.l I thought, "hey, I may as well be happy while i can right?", but i was just deluding myself into thinking everything was goign well, when really i hate where my life is going. I should have gotten off this path a long time ago, back when i realized i hated computer engineering, but now its too late and I have to dop it for the rest of my life. On second thought, maybe i'll jusrt go become a "haberdasher to the stars" or some bullshit like that. sounds lucrative right?

REbecca Black is terrible. she is a terrible, terrible singer. She makes puncturing your own eardrum with a damn toothpick seem like a very appealing option.. why do they play her music at bowling alleys now?! I mean, im not topping any charts either, but she is just awful.

By the way, did yuo know that George Washington was 8 ft tall and weighted a fucking ton? LIterally a ton. 2000 pounds. thats a ton i think.

http://wiki.answers.com/Q/Does_1_ton_has_2000_pounds

Im RIGHT!

Anyway, fuck beign sober, fuck computer engineering, fuck life. just waltz through it as best you can and try not to Darwinize yourself. the only true goal is to survive and contrbute to the growing population crisis thats going to kill off our pathetic race...

if you're still reading, then thanks, whoever you are. in closing, I wish you a very happy April Fool's Day, sucker :)





I know that nobody will fall for this, and that it's probably only funny to me. I considered just stopping, but in the end I decided that the post was too much fun to write, so I kept going. Hope it gave you a laugh.

P.S. - The "Washington" thing is from this video that Sarina showed me the other night. It is pretty damn funny.